I share a lot about what Cora goes through daily being a child with a complex congenital heart defect. However I haven't spoke much about how it effects her siblings. They live with a sister who bears a lot of difficulty, but to them this is all they know.
It must be difficult to be a child who sees her older sibling receive so much attention. To be on the end of wondering if Mom will have time for me, or when will I ever get alone time with my folks? It must be frustrating to bear the stress burden pushed off onto them accidentally. Days when I'm at my whits end, I know I'm short fused and expect more out them. For that I feel terrible. As a Momma who love her children dearly, I never want my children to bear my burdens, my stress, my disappointment. Unfortunately being an imperfect person, brings the inevitable truth that I expect more help and understanding some days from them. I am saddened to see the disappointment upon Cora's sister's faces when I fail in this department.
I recall one time, my middle daughter verbally wishing she had something wrong with her. I stopped instantly in my tracks, mouth open and asked why she's ever wish such a thing. Her answer broke my heart! She felt that if she had a heart defect, I'd have to make time to take her to the doctor and she would then finally get alone time with me. HUGE wake up call for me! Moving rapidly through my days and nights, thinking I have found a system of juggling it all, was an illusion. Reality is I haven't found a system to nurture the special one on one time with Cora's sister's.
Through the rough patches my girls amaze me. They are there to help Cora and me, most of time acting selflessly. They are the little reminders for Cora. The little nurses when we need extra hands, or just a few minutes break. They become teachers at just the right moments. They encourage when moments of keeping up with the crowd occurs. They share a bond as siblings that make me cry. As much as they disagree, and fight like sisters do. They also have a bond that will stand the test of time. Cora's siblings will help hold her up when she can't hold herself up. They have been her "pick me up" when darkness has set in, and they have unconditionally loved a CHD sibling, as if she was perfectly healthy! That my dear friends, is a SIBLING BOND only God can create! Finding a balance will continue to be a work in progress for me. But seeing Cora's siblings demonstrate patients and understanding so often, just astonishes me. And that reason alone, I remember to give praise and honor even during the moments I'm ready to have a breakdown!
Blessings Until Next Time!